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Traditional Hash Songs

Hash Songs are sung on various occasions throughout a hash and inbetween (i.e. you can't get them out of your head!!). Without the songs, a SingStop would be a rather quiet occasion with a rather meaningless name to it. Also the SongMaster would be a master of none and would give him/her an excuse to be a member of the never highly acclaimed Missmanagement (and maybe even drown his sorrow on having a REALLY meaningless job in the beer that was intended for ALL Hashers and Harriets).
Nay - we can't have that !!! - so, we have songs!

Moreover, the songs are a vital turnoff during the DownDowns!Without them, the DownDowns might end in bliss and we can't have that either. All in all, we need the songs and we need them to be sung!
 


Choose a song and give me a note...........!
 

* = DownDown-Song
** = for lazy buggers (i.e. with loads'o actions)
*** = short 'n sweet(!!!)


Hash Hym

(To: Swing Low, Sweet Chariot)
gestures accompany words

I looked over Jordan and what did I see,
Coming for to carry me home,
A band of angels coming after me,
Coming for to carry me home.

CHORUS:
Swing low, sweet chariot,
Coming for to carry me home,
Swing low, sweet chariot,
Coming for to carry me home.

I'm sometimes up and sometimes down,
Comin' for to carry me home,
But still my soul feels heavenly bound.
Comin' for to carry me home.

If you get there before I do,
Coming for to carry me home,
Tell all my friends that I'm coming too,
Coming for to carry me home.

(repeat with variations: humming and motions
only silence and motions only, double-time).

Here's to the Bastard

Here's to ........... , he's true blue.
He's a hasher through and through,
He's a pisspot so they say.
And he'll never get to heaven,
in a long long way.

Drink it down, down, down, down,
Down, down, down, down,
Down, down, down, down,
Down, down, down, down.

(Continue until down down is finished,
or go into "Why are you waiting".)

Why Was He Born So Beautiful?

(a tribute to a hasher)

Why was he born so beautiful,
Why was he born at all.
He's no fucking use to anyone,
He's no fucking use at all.
He might be a joy to his mother,
But he's a pain in the asshole to me!
(Sometimes mooning the recipient)

Drink it down, down, down, down,
Down, down, down, down,
Down, down, down, down,
Down, down, down, down.

(Continue until down down is finished,
or go into "Why are you waiting".)
 

Seitenanfang

 

He Ought to Be Publically Pissed On

(Done to humble a hasher)

He ought to be publicly pissed on.
He ought to be publicly shot (Bang Bang!)
He ought to be tied to a urinal
And kept there to fester and rot.
(Sometimes mooning the recipient)

Drink it down, down, down, down,
Down, down, down, down,
Down, down, down, down,
Down, down, down, down.

(Continue until down down is finished,
or go into "Why are you waiting".)

Zupata

(To "Singing in the Rain")

A-Zup-pa-ta, A-Zup-pa-ta, Aa-Zuup-paa-taaa,
(All sing)
I'm singin' in the rain,
Just singin' in the rain.
What a glorious feeling,
I'm hap-hap-happy again...
Hands together.
Elbows back.
Chest out.
Stomach in.
Arse out.
Knees together.
Feet together.
Chin up.
 

Meet The Hashers

(To "The Flintstones Theme")

Hashers, meet the hashers,
They're the biggest drunks in history,
From old Hamburg,
They're the leaders in debauchery.
Half minds, trailing shiggy through the years,
Watch them as they down a lot of beers,
Down down, down...
 

Seitenanfang

 

Here's To Brother Hasher(s)

(To "Ach, Du Lieber Augustin")

Here's to brother (sister) hasher,
Bother hasher, brother hasher,
Here's to brother hasher,
May he chug-a-lug.
He's happy, he's jolly,
He's fucked up by golly,
Here's to brother hasher,
May he chug-a-lug.
So drink motherfucker,
Drink motherfucker,
Drink motherfucker,
Drink motherfucker,
Here's to brother hasher,
May he chug-a-lug.
 

Dough, Ray, Me

(To "Do, Re, Mi")

Dough, the stuff, that buys me beer,
Ray, the guy who serves me beer,
Me, the guy, who drinks me beer,
Fa, a long way to the john,
So, I'll have another beer,
La, I'll have another beer,
Tea, no thanks I'll have a beer,
And that brings us back to,
Dough . . . (etc)
 

Bitch, a dog, a female dog,
Itch, a place for you to scratch
Hitch, I pull my knickers up
Grab, another word for snatch
Bath, a place for making gin
Sex, another word for sin
Prick, a needle going in,
And that will bring us back to
bitch, bitch, bitch
 

Fuck a duck,
A female duck,
Screw a baby kangaroo,
Finger bang an orangutan,
Let an elephant eat you,
FEEL the penis of an eel,
WHACK the asshole of a yak,
MASTURBATE with a gnu,
That will bring us back to
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck . . .
 

Seitenanfang

 

Father Abraham

(Leader leads, everybody else follows!)

Leader:
Father Abraham had seven sons,
Seven sons had Father Abraham,
And he never smiled,
And he never cried,
All he did was go like this: With a right! (extend right arm)
All:

With a right! (extend right arm)
 
Leader:
Father Abraham had seven sons,
Seven sons had Father Abraham,
And he never smiled,
And he never cried,
All he did was go like this: With a right! (extend right arm)
All:
With a right! (extend right arm)
Leader:
And a left! (extend left arm)
All:
And a left! (extend left arm)

 

More verses and actions:
With a right! (extend right leg)
With a left! (extend left leg)
And a HEEEE! (pelvis thrust)
And a HUUHH! (stick out butt)
 

Seitenanfang

Singing In The Rain

(with actions)

CHORUS: Ah-zuppa-dah, zuppa-dah, zuppa-dah-dah, Zuppa-dah, ...
 
We're singing in the rain,
Just singing in the rain,
What a glorious feeling,
We're hap! hap! happy again . . .

Vers/action: Hold it! Hold it! Hold it!
- Arms out! (Arme vorstrecken)

(repeat chorus, each time with a new vers and action)

- Hands together!
- Thumbs up!
- Elbows bent!
- Shoulders back!
- Chest out!
- Stomach in!
- Ass out!
- Knees together!
- Heels together!
- Toes together!
 

Seitenanfang

He's the Meanest

(To: Okinawa Down Down tune)

He's the meanest,
He sucks the horse's penis,
He's the meanest,
He's a horse's ass.

All he does is pound it,
Ever since he found it,
He's the meanest,
He's a horse's ass.

He's always pissing on us,
He's rotten and dishonest,
He's the meanest,
He's a horse's ass.

Drink it down, down, down, down,
Down, down, down, down,
Down, down, down, down,
Down, down, down, down.

(Continue until down down is finished,
or go into "Why are you waiting".)

Our GM

(To: From the Halls of Montezuma)

There's a man we call our GM,
Who's brave & fine & mad,
And we'll follow him forever,
Though his mental state is bad.

We'll run for him in sunshine,
We'll run for him in rain,
Though we know he's got a swelling,
On the front part of his brain.

Oh, he may have little black-outs,
But they're only fairly slight,
He has moments of depression,
When the Hares don't get it right.

He's got all the classic symptoms,
Of advanced mental decay,
Still we'll kill ourselves for GM,
Despite all the doctors say.
 

Seitenanfang

 

Zulu Warrior

Ola zooma zooma zooma,
Ola zooma zooma chief,
Drink it down you Zulu warrior,
Drink it down you Zulu chief,
Drink it down you Zulu warrior,
Drink it down you Zulu chief, chief, chief!
 

Birth Control

(Zu: Yesterday)

Birth control,
Is the only way to save my soul
since I put it in my girlfriend's hole
I wish I had used birth control,

CHORUS:

Why I had to come I don't know
She wouldn't blow.
I did something wrong,
Now I long for birth control.

Syphilis,
feels like razors every time i piss
Who the hell is to blame for this,
It's agony, this syphilis.

- CHORUS -

Pregnancy,
There's a shotgun hanging over me,
Why does this bulge have to be,
I should have used one, silly me.

- CHORUS -

Leprosy,
Bits and pieces falling off of me,
I'm not the man I used to be,
Oh I believe in leprosy.

- CHORUS -

H.I.V.,
best you speak to Freddy Mercury,
It's pretty deadly H.I.V.
 

Seitenanfang

 

Yogi Bear Song

(To "Camptown Races" - take turns leading verses - raise your beer over your head when it's your go)

There is a bear in the deep dark woods,
Yogi, Yogi,
There is a bear in the deep dark woods,
Yogi, Yogi Bear.

CHORUS (repeat previous verse):
Yogi, Yogi Bear, Yogi, Yogi Bear,
There is a bear in the deep dark woods,
Yogi, Yogi Bear.
 
Other verses:
Yogi has a little friend, Boo-Boo, Boo-Boo
Boo-Boo has a girlfriend, Cyndi, Cyndi
Yogi has a girlfriend, Suzi, Suzi
Yogi does it with condoms, Gummi, Gummi
Yogi didn't wipe his butt, Brown, Brown
Yogi uses Afro-Sheen, Black, Black
Cyndi has a shaven snatch, Grizzly, Grizzly
Cyndi wears crotchless undies, Teddy, Teddy
Cyndi likes it on the ice, Polar, Polar
Cyndi gets what she deserves, Pregnant, Pregnant
Suzi likes it up the rear, Dirty, Dirty
Suzi's snatch it smells like cheese, Cament, Cament
Suzi she has great big tits, More than, More than (I can bear)
Cyndi's tampon has no string, Cotton, Cotton
Boo-Boo likes it upside down, Koala, Koala
Boo-Boo likes to stroke his tool, Wanker, Wanker
Yogi also likes young boys, Poofter, Poofter
 

Seitenanfang

Masturbation Song

(To "Funiculi, Funicula")

Last night I stayed up late and masturbated,
It felt so good, I knew it would.
Last night I stayed up late to masturbate,
It felt so nice, I did it twice.
You should have seen me on the short strokes,
It felt so grand, I used my hand,
And you should have seen me on the long strokes,
It felt so neat, I used my feet.
Shake it, break it, beat it on the floor,
Smash it, bash it, thrust it through the door,
Some people seem to think that fornication's grand,
But for all-around enjoyment, I prefer to use my hand!

 

What A Wank

(To "Wilhelm Tell Overture")

What a wank, what a wank, what a wank, wank, wank,...(asf)

 

A Soldier I Will Be

Asshole, asshole, a soldier I will be
To piss, to piss Two pistols on my knee
For cunt, for cunt, for country and for queen
Asshole, Asshole, Asshole, Asshole,
A soldier I will be

 

Twinkle Twinkle

(To "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star")

Twinkle, Twinkle, little Hasher
Can't you suck a little faster
Down upon my meat so slow
Like a whale about to blow
Twinkle, Twinkle, little Hasher
Can't you suck a little faster

 

Give it a blow

(To "Let it snow")

Well the weather outside is frightful
but my dick is so delightful
If you really want to see it grow
Give it a blow,
Give it a blow,
Give it a blow
 

There was a Little Bird

(To "Little chicky gried")

There was a little bird
No bigger than a turd
Sitting on a telephone pole
He ruffled up his neck
And shit about a peck
He puckered up his little asshole

(point at the offenders)

Asshole, asshole, asshole, asshole
He puckered up his little asshole
 

He's A Hasher

(To "Monty Python's Lumberjack Song")

He's a hasher, he's ok
Works all day, comes out to play
Drinks it down without comlaint
Or he wears it well
Drink it, wear it
Drink it, wear it, wear it
 

Seitenanfang
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